Should You Return To Your Ex?
How long should you wait for your ex before you move on? Maybe your ex told you they need time to think and analyze the situation. Maybe you want to know you try your best and now you can move on.
Many people after a breakup believe there is still hope. They truly believe that soon things will get better and their ex will realize the mistake they did, and everything will be as it was before. Many people try to get their ex back and convince them not to give up, to come back. They promise to change themselves and do everything to make them happy. I want to discuss those topics today because sometimes we forget ourselves while we are chasing someone else. Maybe you can relate to one of those topics and you don’t know what to do. Is there a time you need to give up on hope? Is there a time you need to understand your ex won’t come back? We will discuss now those questions.
Should you return to your ex?
Sometimes the option to return to our ex is in front of our eyes, our ex contacts us and asks us for a comeback. Sometimes it hasn’t yet happened, but we believe it can happen or we hope it will. Before you make a decision, you have to think if it’s right. Of course, when you are in love you see the comeback as the best solution, as the fastest solution and even as the only solution. We are hurt and we only want our ex back so then we see an opportunity we want to jump on it. I don’t want to add my personal opinion because I know people who returned to their ex and had an amazing relationship that lasted forever or for many years. I also know people who gave it another chance and finished even more hurt. There is no right answer because it’s not math, we talk about people here. But there are some questions you need to ask yourself before you make the step.
The questions you need to ask yourself
Do you really believe your ex is the right person for you? Your relationship ended, it’s a signal that something didn’t work out, be honest with yourself, this is the truth. Your relationship isn’t perfect and maybe it’s because you aren’t a good match and there’s nothing wrong with it. Unfortunately, our heart doesn’t know if a person is a good fit or not before it falls in love and many times we find ourselves in love with people who are bad to us and it’s harder to make the right decision when feelings are involved. Be honest with yourself, if you know why your relationship didn’t work and you see it’s something that can’t be solved, don’t go for it. It’s a proven way to failure and pain.
Do you really want to be with someone who gave up on you? For me, love is being there no matters what happens, loving the person with all of his flaws and imperfections. If your ex gave up on you, it’s a huge signal he didn’t love you as you did and isn’t ready to fight for it as you are. Maybe you want to try again and improve things, but if your ex isn’t ready and isn’t there for you, it won’t work. A one-sided relationship never works, you must have 2 people who are ready to work for the relationship and do whatever they can to make it a success story.
Do you really think things can be different this time? If you gave everything and you did all you can and still the relationship didn’t work, why do you think this time it will be different?
Do you think your ex has changed? Have you changed yourself? Maybe for the first time, you were insecure and negative. Maybe you didn’t bring any value or positive energy to the relationship. A breakup is a great opportunity to reflect those things and to improve ourselves. But if you believe you gave your everything, what makes you believe it will be different?
Sometimes we really want our ex back just because we think we will never find someone better. We think our ex is the best for us. The feelings we have, prevent us from thinking rationally. There are so many people out there, no matters your age and your location. Never be with someone only because you are afraid you won’t find someone better. Your guideline should be if you feel good and loved or not. Only this, if no, go away from that relationship, a better relationship is waiting for you for sure.
“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things could fall together” an amazing and an aspiring quote. For me it says all, sometimes a change is required, sometimes things just don’t work out and it’s not the end of the world, so many good things are waiting for you. Don’t let your fears define how you act and how your life will look like.
I understand your desire to return your ex and to rebuild your relationship, but I also want you to be aware of the situation and make the right decision. Ask yourself if your ex is the right person if you are ready to be with someone who gave up on you if you really believe things can go differently this time. After answering all those questions and knowing your ex is the right person for you, your ex is ready to fight for the relationships and both of you have learned what you needed to make things work this time. Go for it but only because you want and not because you’re afraid you won’t find a better person in the future.
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